It’s not unusual for anxiety sufferers to also experienced periodic bouts of depression.  Anxiety and depression are different psychological problems, but they sometimes overlap.  For example, dealing with an ongoing or chronic anxiety situation can easily lead someone to feel depressed. 

But technically, anxiety and depression affect the mind and body in very different ways.  Anxiety is normally associated with the fight or flight response and a heightened sense of awareness.  It’s as if the sufferer is on high alert all the time — unnecessarily.

Depression, on the other hand, is more commonly associated with an extreme feeling of hopelessness and lack of motivation. And rather than feeling that they are on high alert all the time, depressed people can often feel a numbness of the senses, resulting in the inability to experience normal emotions like joy or anger, or even everyday contentment.

But sometimes an individual can experience both the depths of depression and the fight or flight response of anxiety within a single day, or even within the span of an hour. These types of extreme mood swings can sometimes be caused by a physical condition such as a thyroid disorder or diabetes, to name two common examples.

But just as often, extreme mood swings resulting in anxiety and depression can be the result of unproductive” thinking habits.”  In the same way that we all have our daily routine and behavioral habits, over the years we also develop specific “thinking habits.”  And it is clear that certain thinking habits tend to be strongly correlated with anxiety and/or depression, while other habits discourage these problems.

This is why the EasyCalm series focuses on recognizing unproductive thinking habits, and then initiating a new set of habits to counteract them.  What the series DOESN’T do is ask you to change your old habits.

Trying to change or eliminate a well-established habit can be difficult. Anyone who has ever tried to quit smoking, quit over-eating, or quit anything can attest to this. But developing a NEW habit is much, much easier.  In fact most experts agree it only takes about three weeks of daily repetition to firmly establish a new habit.

That’s why the EasyCalm series deals with establishing new thinking habits, not trying to quit the ones you already have that cause anxiety or depression. The goal is to create new habits that are not conducive to anxiety, panic attacks, depression, obsessive thinking or other emotional issues. Once these habits are in place, they effectively block the old unproductive habits, and the result is a significant increase in quality-of-life.

While the series has proven very effective at this, is important to remember that anyone experiencing severe or ongoing depression (not just the occasional case of the blues) should see their doctor right away. While self-help techniques can be beneficial to people dealing with depression, it is always critically important to see a doctor first — especially if the depression is severe or in any way life-threatening.

Learn More about the EasyCalm Anxiety Series

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Generalized anxiety is probably the most common type of anxiety issue in the world, and it’s what I like to call a “lifestyle anxiety.” That is to say that, generalized anxiety not only affects your lifestyle, but it is actually caused by your lifestyle…

You see, generalized anxiety builds up over time, through a series of small, seemingly trivial habits that are adopted. Soon, these anxiety producing habits simply become part of your “lifestyle,” and many times the individual is completely unaware they even have them!

An example of this is breathing issues related to anxiety (shortness of breath/ tight chest feelings). These sensations can sometimes be caused by a very subtle contraction of the chest, stomach and back muscles. So subtle in fact, that you may not even be aware you are doing it. But over time this habit of tightening up the muscles in the torso can produce a feeling of tightness in the chest and even mimic the symptoms of asthma. If you’ve ever experienced breathing difficulties and the doctors can find no physical cause, you could be dealing with this “tight muscle” phenomenon (always see your doctor first for any breathing problems).

Now, a common question I receive is, how does EasyCalm work in cases of generalized  anxiety like these?  I want to briefly explain two important ways that EasyCalm works to eliminate these issues:

 1. The EasyCalm Series (www.easycalm.com) works by changing your lifestyle in small but significant ways. It is about introducing new habits and daily routines that are NOT conducive to anxiety at all, to promote a calmer, more “take it as it comes” state of mind. Rather than trying to get you to “stop” doing something, or changing the habits you already have, the EasyCalm Series works by instilling new habits that effectively cancel out the old (anxiety causing) ones. In my experience this is THE WAY to overcome generalized anxiety, no matter how long you have dealt with it or which specific anxiety symptoms you may have. We have many, many success stories that demostrate how EasyCalm works so well in this regard.
 
2. To explain point number two I have to let you in on a little “secret” that took me 20 years to figure out, and completely changed my life. Ready? Here it is: anxiety is not a condition, it is a SYMPTOM.

Generalized anxiety is a symptom of an emotional imbalance in your life. And by dealing with the underlying control issues and unresolved conflict that build up over time, emotional balance can be restored, freeing you of the anxiety symptoms. It sounds pretty simple, right. That’s because it is simple, but not always obvious. Especially when some MDs and mental health practicioners still persist in the antiquated notion of referring to generalized anxiety as a “disorder” or a “condition,” even though modern research suggests this not the case at all.
 
A good example is the obsessive mind ”chatter” that many anxiety sufferers have (obesessive thoughts). It is actually nothing but a learned habit, and by shaking up your daily routine (the series shows you how) you can replace this habit with one that is more beneficial to you. Remember, any habit you learn can also be unlearned. There is nothing genetic or permanent about a habit (even those that cause generalized anxiety). It is simply a way of thinking or acting that has been repeated often enough to become habitualized.
 
In a nutshell, approaching generalized anxiety as a symptom, not a condition, is the key difference of our method, and it’s why EasyCalm works to stop generalized anxiety, even when many other programs fail.

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Everybody who has suffered with panic attacks and anxiety has wondered where these things come from. What is the cause of panic attacks?As an NLP practitioner, I tend to not focus on causes and symptoms, but instead focus on changes that bring positive results. In fact, NLP (neurolinguistic programming) is all about results, and doesn’t get bogged down dealing with causes for any problem, including anxiety and panic attacks.

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Today I want to talk about how to stop panic attacks; and specifically, how to deal with the mental “loops” that both cause and sustain panic attacks. Psychological research suggests that as much as 95% of human thought is repetitive in nature — in other words, it is loop-based.  This discovery has prompted some notable psychiatrists and cognitive researchers to suggest that what we used to call “hypnosis” or a “hypnotic state” is actually a natural phenomenon that occurs in every human being a regular basis. 

Hypnotic states are repetitive, loop based thinking processes. And as the new research demonstrates, we all experience these states to one degree or another on a daily basis.  For example, have you ever driven a car somewhere and once you arrived found that you could not really remember the trip or the details about what happened between home and your destination?  That’s because you were in a type of trance or hypnotic state while driving.  This is a perfect example of loop-based thinking, where the mind takes one idea — such as driving a car — and focuses on it repetitively.

So what does all this have to do with stopping panic attacks? Actually, a whole lot. Panic attacks are the ultimate example of loop-based thinking. They are a kind of hypnotic state, albeit one that is extremely negative and destructive to the sufferer.  Panic attacks begin with a terrifying image or sensation, which then begins to feedback onto itself in a loop. So the sufferer’s mind just goes around on and around in an obsessive loop, which feeds off of the original fear.  

How to stop panic attacks? First, realize what they are, cognitive loops; then use one of several methods to “break the spell” of the panic attack by either 1. stopping the loop, or 2. introducing a new loop that is more beneficial.  Let’s take a look at these two techniques to stop panic attacks, one at a time. 

Stopping panic attacks by halting a cognitive loop: 

In some cases, panic attacks can be stopped very quickly by shifting your focus in an extreme way.  Although it is not always appropriate or possible to use this method, if you can get a moment alone in a private place, there are things you can do to “shock your system,” and halt the repetitive loop of the panic attack.  One method is to scream at the top of your voice, “stop!”  A loud outburst of this type can often be enough to stop the mental loop that is running (the panic attack). 

Another technique is to shower with extremely cold water, or if that’s not possible at the moment, just put ice cubes straight from the freezer down your shirt. Again, the shock of the freezing cold water or ice will often be enough to stop the panic attack “loop,” and reset your thought processes. 

Stopping panic attacks by replacing a cognitive loop: 

In this method, you’re trying to start a new cognitive loop to compete with the panic attack loop that is already running.  One way of doing this is to repetitively sing a very catchy line from a song over and over and over again. Pick a song you really like, with a catchy melody, and don’t sing the whole song — just one or two catchy lines, and repeat them again and again until you feel your state has shifted and the panic attack is fading. 

Another method is to simply repeat a short, catchy phrase.  You can say it out loud or just inside your head.  Famous phrases such as “Now is the time for all good men to come to the aid of their country,” often work, or a scripture quote. You can pick any phrase that flows easily for you and is simple to remember, and it doesn’t have to be motivational or positive — just a bland “neutral” comment is fine.    The key is to repeat the phrase almost obsessively and get into a rhythm with it, so it quickly becomes a repetitive cognitive loop, displacing the old loop — and stopping the panic attack. These are just a few methods to stop panic attacks, and you can find more in the EasyCalm anxiety video series, including our very popular 30 second breathing technique to stop panic attacks. J.Mercer, MA
www.easycalm.com

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The  “Instant Tranquility” NLP Hypnosis Session

Today I’m proud to announce that we have updated the EasyCalm anxiety series to include a brand new NLP hypnosis session called “Instant Tranquility.” The session works relatively quickly, using powerful linguistic “loops”  derived from NLP to calm anxiety and stress, and replace anxious and panicky feelings with a sense of optimism and well-being.

We’ve had phenomenal responses so far to Instant Tranquility, and it is now included as a free bonus with the full EasyCalm series. But because I believe that NLP techniques are such a powerful tool against anxiety and panic attacks, I want everyone to be able to try this hypnosis session, not just those two have purchased the EasyCalm anxiety series. For that reason, I have made the entire session available free on our homepage:  http://www.easycalm.com/

I have also put  Instant Tranquility on YouTube,  where it is rapidly becoming very popular.   I will post a link to the session below in this post so you can try it for yourself . We’re very proud of the success of Instant Tranquility, and hope to add more NLP hypnosis sessions to the EasyCalm series over the next 6 months.

Neurolinguistic programming, or NLP, is probably the most powerful tool available for “reframing” fears, so it is ideal for combating panic attacks and anxiety. Try the session and be sure to leave a comment and let us know how well it works for you too. Great  changes have been reported by many users after only using this session once or twice. It works well for simply relaxing after a stressful day, too! 

So even if you don’t have an anxiety or panic attack  “problem,” you may still notice it helps you relax deeply and stay in a happier state of mind. Afterward, please leave a comment, and thanks in advance for  all your  positive feedback — it is much appreciated.  

Try the Instant Tranquility NLP hypnosis session here!

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Social phobia (also known as social anxiety) is a deceptively prevalent problem in society, particularly in the more “developed” nations of North America and Western Europe. Interestingly, social phobia is less common in many so-called “developing” or “emerging” countries of the world, where there is often a greater emphasis on family and social interdependence, but significantly less emphasis on individualism and the pursuit of wealth.

Because I’ve been traveling a great deal recently, this discrepancy has caused me to wonder about the role culture plays in social phobia. For example, in the United States, individualism is a very strong part of the culture.  The archetype of the “lone cowboy” out on the range, completely self-sufficient and living life on his own terms, is a very pervasive theme in American culture. It is something deep in our collective psyche.

But in the Scandinavian countries of northern Europe, for example, the concept of the individual is considerably less emphasized in society.  Perhaps because they are stable socialist democracies, countries like Sweden and Norway place greater importance on social interdependence and cooperation. And although social phobia does exist in these countries, it is interesting to note that they tend to have significantly lower rates of this problem than either the US or the UK (to name two examples of more individual-focused countries).

All this suggests that society and culture are at least partially to blame for the high rate of social phobia in the West. On the surface, this would seem to make common sense.  After all, social phobia is a fear of “society,” and undeniably, certain societies in the world are easier to fear than others(!).

I want to be clear that I am NOT suggesting that social phobia isn’t an emotional problem that can affect individuals, no matter where they live. I’m simply pointing out that certain societies (and I’ll single out American society to make my point) contribute to the prevalence of social phobia by fostering cultural values which glorify the lone individual, and downplay the importance of the group and social interaction. 

The competitive, hyper-capitalist environment of many American cities encourage this “every person for themselves” attitude. Is it so surprising that our cities are breeding grounds for social phobia, social avoidance, and other anxiety issues?

You know the old saying: “it takes two to tango.”  And when it comes to social phobia, there are two distinct elements involved.  One is the phobia or fear on the part of the individual.  The other is the society that is feared. In my mind, both undoubtedly play a part in social phobia.

Politically and culturally, some societies appear to encourage fear more than others. Conversely, some societies encourage cooperation and connection more than others. My friend from South America has lived in the US nearly 4 years now.  When I asked her impression of America she had a lot of praise and admiration for the country.  But interestingly, she also pointed out, “there’s one thing I have noticed though — I have never seen as many lonely people as here in the United States. There is something in the culture that seems to discourage people from relying on each other and trusting each other.  That part of America makes me sad.”

We’ve all seen the kind of people she’s talking about: disconnected, frustrated, seeing themselves as separated from (and in some cases oblivious to) the culture around them. And these underlying feelings of alienation and competition run so deep in society that even those of us who don’t want to live that way are affected by them. Like it or not, the culture becomes a part of who we “are.”

I’m not ranting against the United States — far from it.  But I suppose I AM ranting against aspects of our shared culture, especially what I term “hyper-individualism,” or the political and cultural threads in society that discourage cooperation, compromise, interdependence, and trust. I believe these same threads are responsible for the high rate of social phobia in the US as well.

As the poet said, “No man is an island.” We are social creatures by design, and our culture should reflect this obvious truth. And yet, too often our politicians and cultural leaders seek to divide and conquer by playing on fear and mistrust. These attitudes filter down through society, encouraging paranoia, loneliness and even social phobia.

It’s not about being on the right or the left, or about conservative or liberal policies — it’s about recognizing the fundamental truth that we are NOT desperate, fear-based little creatures living alone in the world.  We are connected to and interdependent on those around us, and we thrive in the world by virtue of these connections with others.

I don’t think it’s a coincidence that the United States has the highest reported rate of social phobia in the world. Our culture has somehow managed to equate interdependence with “weakness,” while at the same time, discouraging compromise and cooperation — the pillar stones of any great culture.  Even those of us who don’t have social phobia can find ourselves pulling back from others more than we probably should sometimes.

When individuals develop social phobia and other anxiety problems, all of us suffer.  We become less productive as a society when all of our members aren’t living up to their potential.  Perhaps it’s time for a complete overhaul (or at least a re-think) of our cultural values.  For now, the best thing we can do as individuals is to make it a point to connect with people every day — and not just our family and friends.  If we want our culture to be more social, WE have to be the change we want to see, and be willing to reach out to people and show a little trust.

Social phobia may not completely disappear in societies that show more cooperation and interdependence, but research shows that it is dramatically diminished. Let us each do our part to help stamp out the isolationist “lone wolf” culture that allows social phobia to flourish. We’ll also be making the US a friendlier and more “connected” place to live, which can only be a good thing…right?

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Many people are taking fish oil these days to help protect themselves from heart disease and a wide variety of other illnesses.  Research has shown that omega-3 fish oil could be of the most useful natural supplements known to mankind, promoting good heart health, easing joint pain and arthritis, and improving overall health.

But new research suggests that fish oil is also useful for certain types of anxiety, depression and other mood disorders.  For example, one recent study by Andrew Stoll of Harvard Medical School found that higher dosages of omega-3 fish oil were useful in controlling the symptoms of bipolar disorder. Here’s an overview of that study, and other recent research showing the benefits of fish oil for anxiety and depression:

http://www.alive.com/1147a3a2.php?subject_bread_cramb=768

In fact, there is beginning to be an enormous amount of evidence suggesting that omega-3 fish oil promotes both a healthy body and mind. While this research itself might not suggest that fish oil is a “cure” for anxiety or depression, it does appear to be beneficial for both of these conditions, and could make it easier for anxiety sufferers to recover.

 With all the other health-related benefits of taking fish oil, it especially makes sense for people dealing with either depression or anxiety to talk to their doctor about a daily regimen that includes a healthy dose of Omega three fish oil.  Note: if you’re considering taking larger doses of fish oil (such as those used in some research studies) it is especially important to clear this with your doctor first.  Although it is a 100% natural substance, higher dosages are fish oil can have side effects, just like any other supplement.

Personally, I’m a big fan of fish oil, and I think it has played a role in helping me to recover from the anxiety and panic attacks I used to live with. How much of a difference the fish oil has made I can’t say, but I do believe it has helped promote a more stable mood, enabling me to deal with the ups and downs of life better.

However, in my experience is very important to use quality brands of fish oil, containing high amounts of DHA. Of course, these capsules are more expensive than the standard “cheapo” brands you can  find at retail outlets, but when it comes to fish or oil, quality really does make a big difference. The cheaper brands have relatively low levels of DHA, and are not processed to completely filter out harmful contaminants that are sometimes found in fish (Mercury being one example). Omegabright is one brand I can recommend — it is the same brand used in research studies by prestigious universities, including Harvard. You can read more about research conducted using Omegabright on their web site:  www.omegabrite.com

More Information about Fish Oil for Anxiety…

Jon Mercer
www.easyalm.com

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Well, the holiday season is upon us once again and I hope wherever you are, you and your family have a great time– with a minimum of stress and anxiety! 

I don’t think I’m giving away any big secret by saying that many people find the holiday family get-togethers stressful. And in the past, we’ve talked about ways to minimize the anxiety that is sometimes inherent in these situations.

If you’re one of the many people who find the holidays stressful, it can be comforting to realize that you’re not alone. And whatever you do, DO NOT blame yourself about it.  Many, many people find the holidays a bit tough to deal with.

My advice is to keep in mind that these holiday get-togethers usually only last a couple of days, and then it’s back to “real life.” And if all else fails, have a little holiday drink to help you relax — just don’t go too far with it. Family get-togethers can quickly turn into a nightmare when too much alcohol is added into the mix, increasing the general level of anxiety for everyone. 

Like most things in life, a little bit of “holiday cheer” is a good thing, but too much is worse than none at all!

Happy Holidays from all of us here at EasyCalm!
Jon

www.easycalm.com

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 Nearly every day I get a few e-mails describing a variety of strange physical and emotional symptoms. The majority of the people e-mailing me want to know if their symptoms could be panic attacks, or something altogether more serious. And because I’ve been doing this a while, it is pretty rare for someone to describe a type of panic attack symptom that I have never heard of– however, it does happen occasionally…

 In this post I want to mention a few of the more “unusual” symptoms and issues that can be caused by panic attacks and anxiety.We’ve talked about all the “normal” panic attack symptoms in the past, such as stomach discomfort, shortness of breath, dizziness, obsessive yawning, tingling in the arms and legs, and many others. Now let’s take a look at some of the more “weird” symptoms. 

One unusual symptom of panic attacks that is rarely discussed is a morbid fear of eating in public. I’m not sure if this is becoming more common, but I have noticed that I get more e-mails about it than I used to. Hmmm….

Another eating-related symptom is an extreme fear of food touching the back of the mouth when eating.Those who experience this sometimes feel like they are on the verge of choking when this happens; and it often triggers panic attacks.

Different types of separation anxiety are not particularly uncommon, but there is an unusual variation of this that has come to my attention: a few panic attack sufferers have a fear of being alone, and MUST be around their close friends or family at all times–but at the same time, they experience a type of social anxiety when they ARE around their friends or family. So it creates a Catch-22 situation. This one doesn’t appear to be very common (thankfully), but it can make life hell for those who are living with it.

And finally, I have to mention this one: in the five and a half years we have been online, I have received two e-mails from individuals who had severe phobias about seeing another person’s feet. Both of these individuals claimed that if they saw anyone’s naked feet, panic attacks would ensue right away.  And surprisingly, one of the e-mailers even claimed that he would become panicky if he saw his OWN feet without shoes or socks on. I can only imagine how hard it would be to try to avoid the sight of your own feet throughout your whole life –not an easy way to live. 

Those are just a few of the more unusual panic attack symptoms that have been reported to me over the years. But please, leave a comment and let me know if you have an unusual anxiety or panic attack symptom that I haven’t mentioned. Remember, you can do it anonymously if you like– we are all about protecting everyone’s privacy here at Easycalm.

 The EasyCalm Video Series teaches methods to overcome panic attacks, no matter what kind of symtpoms you may have. That’s because EasyCalm doesn’t just deal with the symptoms, but gets to the root of the problem to help you quickly change the “mental environment”that is allowing the attacks to happen in the first place.  One of the great benefits of this is that it creates a greater sense of self-confidence, reassuring you that you CAN deal with panic attacks. Once this confidence begins to build, most users overcome the attacks altogether. And as a former sufferer of severe panic attacks, I know what a sweet feeling it is to be rid of them (good riddance!). 

Take care,
Jon Mercer
www.easycalm.com

www.easyalm.com

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 As you might imagine, we receive lots of questions about anxiety and panic attacks here at EasyCalm.com. Some of the most common questions we get are about the nature of panic attack symptoms, and if a particular sensation is actually caused by panic and anxiety, or something altogether different. 

 The truth is, panic attacks can have all kinds of symptoms. Some of them are very common (upset stomach,unexplained sense of terror, hyperventilation, lightheadedness and dizziness) but others are more unusual (fear of eating in public, obsessive thoughts, frequent yawning, feeling of being “unreal” or detached from reality, flu-like symptoms and muscle soreness).

But regardless of which panic attack symptoms you are having, there is one characteristic that is common to all panic attacks, and that is a feeling that the uncomfortable emotions being experienced are somehow “permanent.” The fact is, anxiety and panic attack symptoms are fleeting–they come and go, sometimes almost inexplicably.

 Of course, when you’re in the middle of a panic attack it can be difficult to remind yourself that these feelings are fleeting, and that they will pass just as quickly as they came on. Still, it IS possible to learn to view panic attack symptoms as temporary things, and just allow them to fade naturally on there own.

 It takes time to develop this “overview”of panic attack symptoms, but it is a skill anyone can build with consistent effort. Many people find it helpful to simply “observe” the symptoms in an analytical sort of way. This allows you to detach from them to some degree, and the more detachment you can obtain, the less severe the attacks tend to be.

The EasyCalm Video Series teaches methods to develop this “overview” of anxiety and panic attack symptoms. This quickly allows you to view the attacks in a very different way– a way that does not seem nearly as “personal” or severe. This level of detachment builds as you go through the series, creating a greater sense of confidence that you CAN deal with the attacks.

 The irony is, once you begin to be confident that you can handle panic attacks (should they occur), they tend to dissipate on their own.  Why is this? Because panic attacks feed off of fear –YOUR fear. Once your level of fear about the attacks is decreased, so is their power over you. This is one of the central points of the EasyCalm method, and it has helped thousands of people to regain control over panic attacks and anxiety.

Take care,
Jon Mercer
www.easycalm.com

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Can Panic Attacks Hurt You? 

There’s no two ways about it: panic attacks are frightening.  But can anxiety and panic attacks hurt you physically, not just emotionally? The answer to this question is no — and yes.  Here’s what I mean:  While panic attacks can be emotionally draining and cause an intense sensation of fear, there is no evidence that they can physically hurt you “when they are happening.”   

You will notice that I tacked on the phrase “when they are happening” to the end of that last sentence, and here’s why: there is ample evidence that panic attacks (and anxiety in general) can weaken the immune system, leaving your body vulnerable to a wide range of physical ailments. There is an enormous amount of research data demonstrating that anxiety, panic attacks and even everyday stress is detrimental to our health.

But the health effects of panic attacks are not immediate.  They posed no threat to you “in the moment” even though you may feel like you’re about to pass out or die.  The real threat from panic attacks is when they become a way of life, when you begin suffering with anxiety on a regular basis.  This constant strain takes its toll on the body as well as the mind. 

That’s why it is so important to be proactive, and actively work to reduce both the intensity and frequency of panic attacks. So don’t worry; panic attacks cannot hurt you, no matter how horrible they feel in the moment.  But remember, living with panic attacks CAN hurt you over a long period of time by weakening your body and shattering your confidence.   Don’t allow yourself be a victim.  Take action to get help for your panic attacks before they become not just an emotional problem, but a physical one too. JM
www.easyalm.com

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It came to my attention long ago that many anxiety sufferers tend to focus inward (on the self) to an unhealthy extent. I have been as guilty of this as anyone, and developing the habit of “outward focus” made a huge difference in my life, and helped eliminate the symptoms of generalized anxiety that I struggled wiuth for so many years. In fact, practicing focusing your attention on others is one of the best tips for generalized anxiety. The way to get started is to think about how you can help others, and what you can do to make someone’s situation better. It is ironic that focusing on helping others ends up making us happier and calmer too, but you know what they say, “Life gives to the givers and takes from the takers.”

 What can you GIVE?

Normally, when we are stuck on the “hamster wheel” of obsessive thoughts and anxiety, other peoples problems are the furthest thing from our minds. We tend to be all wrapped up in how WE can feel better, and what WE need. But by turning this focus around 180 degrees, we can end up helping both other people AND ourselves. Generalized anxiety doesn’t really thrive in a mind that is focused on giving and helping others — at least not for long.

None of this is meant to imply that generalized anxiety sufferers are selfish or uncaring — far from it. But it does imply that many (if not most) people dealing with these issues tend to fall into the trap of “thinking too much,” and particularly, thinking of themselves and their state of mind too much.

Right now, at this moment, you know someone who could use your help, attention, understanding, affection or encouragement. We all do. Why not try a little experiment: the next time you begin feeling anxious, try turning your attention to this person, and what YOU can do to help them. I’m not suggesting you put other peoples needs ahead of your own all the time,  or forget to take good care of yourself;  just that you reduce the amount of time and energy you spend dealing with your own issues, and focus more of this attention on someone else’s situation, and positive steps you can take to help them.

 Helping others is the best way to help ourselves

I will freely admit that working with other people to reduce the stress and generalized anxiety in their life has helped me too. Sometimes, even writing an email to someone or a blog post like this will help remind me to focus outward more, and to turn my attention to others, and what I can do to to help them. Giving of yourself is a powerful tonic for generalized anxiety (and many other problems). Forgive the cliche, but another old saying just came to mind:

“You only get what you give”

Take care,
Jon

www.easycalm.com

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I often get emails asking about the differences between EasyCalm and other methods of overcoming anxiety, so I wanted to post my thoughts on the subject today.

 Of course, I haven’t tried EVERY possible method of overcoming anxiety and panic attacks, but I have tried a LOT! (it’s sad/funny because it’s true! haha) Here’s how I think the EasyCalm Series differs from other programs:

Many popular methods say that you have to re-train your thoughts (pretty much all of them), but the big difference in programs is HOW they propose to do this. EasyCalm (www.easycalm.com) uses a very gradual approach to build a “pattern of success” (very important) to change your overall outlook and the way you deal with potential anxiety situations (and life in general). It is true that we’ve had great success with this method, and I have coached it to hundreds of people over the last 5 years who have turned their life around completely. Here’s one of the reasons why:
 
One of the main points of EasyCalm is that “you literally cannot start too small.” This means, that you can set your expectations extremely low in the beginning–it really does not matter, as long as you are consistent (that is the key). We use small improvements (little victories) to build upon and create a pattern of success (successfully dealing with life’s challenges and worries). Over time, this decreases the base level of anxiety and research shows that it actually “rewires” the neural pathways in the brain. So you not only FEEL different, you actually ARE different.
 
In my experience, this type of behavioral modification technology is vastly underused — a great deal of substantial research verifies the benefits of using this methodology to overcome a wide range of behavioral/emotional issues such as anxiety and even depression. And of course, we offer a more comprehensive refund policy than most methods — a full 2 months. This ensures that anyone can try our approach and test the results for themselves with absolutely no risk — just the way it should be.
 
One personal note: these days, many people are aware of the concept, “Whatever you focus your attention upon  tends to expand in your life.” Well, in my experience, this is ESPECIALLY true of anxiety. That is why the EasyCalm Series focuses on successes (even small ones) and progress (no matter how modest) to build stronger and stronger patterns of success. In effect, we deal more with solutions and strengths, than problems and limitations. That, to me, is the single greatest attribute that sets us apart. When you get down to it, EasyCalm (www.easycalm.com) is not really about anxiety at all (oddly enough!) — it is about enjoying a healthy, balanced life. That is the goal, so THAT is were we place the bulk of our attention!
 
Until next time, be well and be aware — where is your focus today?
Jon
 
 
Jon Mercer, MA
Personal Development Coach
http://www.easycalm.com/
Managing Director, Youniverse LLC

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I recently received an email from an social anxiety sufferer who was making progress using the EasyCalm Series, but was still struggling a bit to “let go” and overcome the control issues that are always present with anxiety(especially social anxiety).  To protect the writer’s privacy, I will call her “Meg” for the purposes of this post. I have included my response to Meg’s question below, because it may be useful to others who are just starting out with EasyCalm.

If you haven’t tried the EasyCalm method yet, a few parts of this reply may seem a bit confusing, but I think there are also points that can help anyone, regardless of how far along they are in overcoming their anxiety (social anxiety or otherwise), or which method they choose to use.

Below is my original reply to “Meg’s” question about struggling to overcome social anxiety:

Dear “Meg,”

The most important point in using the EasyCalm series is to start really small–do NOT expect too much of yourself at first. I am serious about this–you can start as small as you want–it really doesn’t matter as long as you follow the method. Setting small goals like just being in the presence of strangers for 30 secs or a minute is absolutely fine; you can always build up from there.

If you are getting exhausted or feel like you are struggling, you are no doubt setting your goals too large–too soon. This is one of the worst things you can do because it will re-confirm the old negative patterns and social fears you already have. It is far better to start extremely small and build up a pattern of success that you can continue to build upon. They say “success breeds more success, and failure only breeds more failure.” This is especially true with issues like “control” and social anxiety.

A tool I have often used with coaching clients is a simple logic statement that goes like this:

“The more you__________, the more you WILL ___________. “ Whatever action you place in the first blank always goes in the second blank as well.

Some examples:

“The more you worry, the more you WILL worry.” (because it becomes your habitual way of reacting)
“The more you fail, the more you WILL fail.”

“The more you feel good, the more you WILL feel good.”

“The more you let go and relax, the more you WILL let go and relax.”

This tool sounds incredibly simple, and because of this, it may seem difficult to take seriously at first. However, if you will keep this logic statement in mind as you go through your day, it will keep you mentally on the right path, and you can concentrate on building ”patterns of success,” no matter how small. And of course, “The more you succeed (at anything), the more you WILL succeed.”

One more simple tip for social anxiety: try “loaded question” affirmations before you go into a stressful situation. Using an affirmation like “I feel calm around people,” doesn’t work for many people, because the mind rejects the statement outright. But if you calmly and repetitively ask yourself questions like, “Why am I always so calm around people?” — “what makes me so relaxed with people?” and then really allow your mind to search for answers to this question, it bypasses the critical, skeptical part of the mind and is more easily accepted.

One of my clients had great success asking “What makes me such a calm, laid-back person?” and  “Why do people love me so much?” and then meditating on the possible answers to these questions. Repeating these questions slowly and calmly for 5-10 minutes before a social situation produced very noticeable positive changes. I highly recommend it for anyone dealing with social anxiety. It can be more effective than you might think!

Wishing you all the very best,
Jon

Jon Mercer, MA
Personal Development Coach
http://www.easycalm.com/
http://www.easycalm.com/social.htm
http://www.cafepress.com/socialskills.81169853
Managing Director, Youniverse LLC

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Anxiety attack symptoms come in many different “flavors.” Some people experience shortness of breath. Others have “pins and needles” type sensations in their arms or legs. Still others have chest pains, obsessive yawning or an upset stomach. Symptoms of anxiety attacks can take on many different forms, but they all have something in common: they represent an imbalance in lifestyle and personal habits.

 The fact is, anxiety attacks are not a “condition” exactly. Anxiety (and the many different anxiety attack symptoms that they produce) is a clear signal that our lives have gotten out of balance. I’m not talking about some new age type of “balance,” but rather, that plain old common-sense type of balance that keeps us healthy and in good spirits.

For example, if you begin eating a diet of sugary sweets on a daily basis, this habit will have very real physical affects on your body, and you will soon notice “symptoms” like weight gain, poor complexion, trouble sleeping, etc. In the same way, if your develop unhealthy “thinking habits,” you may begin to notice anxiety attack symptoms like those mentioned above.

We all know that practicing healthy eating habits is important in order to stay healthy, but many times we forget that practicing healthy  thinking habits is just as important to stay emotionally healthy. When we fill our mind with “toxins” like worry, drama, and conflict, we are simply inviting anxiety attack symptoms to flare up.

Watch the free NO-anxiety video at EasyCalm.com

And while it is true that some degree of worry, drama and conflict is inherently a part of life, the truth is, most of us add additional (and unnecessary) stress in our lives by watching high-drama fueled television shows, reading depressing books, and even by listening to deafest and dis-empowering music.

Right about now, you may be thinking, “yeah but Jon, everyone watches those TV shows and reads those books and listens to that music. How bad can it be when everyone I know is doing it, and most of them seem to be getting along just fine?”

To this question, I would have to answer, “there’s a very good chance most of them aren’t getting along just fine.” Anxiety attack symptoms are something very few people are willing to talk about openly–even to close friends and family. I cannot count the number of people who have emailed me about anxiety symptoms who admitted they have never told another living soul about the problem.

The “official” statistics indicate that anxiety attacks are a HUGE public health issue; nearly an epidemic. But the “official” statistics only tell a small part of the story. With so many people hiding their anxiety from the world, we may never know the true numbers or what percentage of society actually suffers with anxiety attacks. Some experts speculate that it is well above 50%! Think about that for a moment…

Anxiety attack symptoms are often confusing and misdiagnosed. And the fact that so many people hide them only make the problem worse, and cause suffers to feel alone, isolated, “weird” or inferior. And it is all so unnecessary.

Anxiety attacks can be lessened and overcome altogether by following a straight-forward plan of gradually changing your daily thinking habits. It is not an overnight solution (it can take a few weeks or even a month to see good results), but it is the ONLY way I personally have found to make lasting change and overcome this nonsense once and for all. The EasyCalm Series explains all these points in great detail, but for now I want to leave you with 3 simple “lifestyle” tips that will help lesson the frequency and severity of anxiety attacks symptoms:

1. Turn off the TV, or at least the high-drama and conflict shows (yes, I know they are exciting, but they are NOT good for your state of mind).

2. DO NOT (under any circumstances) watch the news or read a newspaper every day. Once a week is enough to stay informed, and even then, DO NOT get bogged down with horrible or depressing stories.

3. Practice gratitude as a way of life. Make it a point to think about what you are grateful for every day. This trains your mind to work in a different way, to focus on what you want, NOT what you don’t want (like anxiety attacks). The effects of this simple practice are accumulative, and can change your life significanly for the better. If you’re skeptical, that’s fine. Just try it for 3 weeks and then email me and tell me if your life got better or worse as a result (I already know the answer to that one).

Take Care!
Jon

Jon Mercer
Personal Development Coach
www.easycalm.com

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