The Anxiety/Panic Attack Journal

Anxiety symptoms cause people to get “worked up.” But to friends and loved ones who have never suffered with anxiety problems, sometimes it can seem like much ado about nothing. Of course, anxiety is not about “nothing.” It’s as serious as a heart attack when you’re dealing with it, even if some people don’t recognize this.

But it can be difficult and isolating to deal with anxiety when your friends and family members can’t relate to what you’re going through; when they just don’t seem to “get it.” So how can you talk to them about about it? Here are three tips to communicate more effectively with your loved ones about an anxiety problem:

1. Communicate from a Position of Self Empowerment, NOT as a Victim of Anxiety

Those of you who have used the EasyCalm Anxiety Video Series will be aware of the importance of not defining yourself as a victim of anxiety or panic attacks.  This is also very important when you’re talking to others about your anxiety, symptoms or related issues.  Simply put, it is difficult to communicate with someone who sees themselves as a “victim.”  It can even encourage a “blame the victim” mentality at times, which is obviously very unhelpful.

Instead, communicate about your anxiety issues unapologetically — be straightforward and matter of fact about them.

This makes matters much less awkward for the other person, and they’ll be more likely to empathize with your situation (without sympathizing), and help you deal with the anxiety symptoms or panic attacks as much as they can.

 2. Don’t Just Talk About Problems –Discuss Solutions Too

Even though anxiety can cause some very negative emotions, you don’t want to get into the habit of only talking about the symptoms and the debilitating nature of anxiety. Anxiety problem or not, no one enjoys talking to a “Debbie Downer.” Make sure you balance the conversation by discussing solutions and your determination to overcome anxiety.

3. The Squeaky Wheel Gets the Grease — Ask for Help If You Need It

Don’t be shy about asking those you trust for advice. And if they offer advice, resist the temptation to immediately shoot it down or tell them why “that won’t work.”  After all, they’re only trying to help because they care about you; and even if they don’t fully understand anxiety, many times their ideas are still worth considering.

Let’s face it: if you’re experiencing anxiety or panic attacks it’s clear that what you’re doing now is not producing the right results — so you’ve nothing to lose by trying something different. And remember, the same kind of thinking that got you into the problem, is not the kind of thinking that will get you out of it. Be open to trying the recommendations of others, even if they seem unorthodox or overly simple. You never know until you try…

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Have you ever considered that anxiety isn’t actually real?  I know, I know, it seems real.  It can even feel real. And its effects (anxiety symptoms) can certainly be real. But the anxiety itself is entirely imaginary — it is created in the mind and has no life outside of your imagination.

Perhaps more than any other “condition” that affects our physical and mental well-being, anxiety is a fictional projection of the mind.  We create worst-case scenarios and imagine a bleak future whenever our minds are consumed with anxiety.  It is a very creative act. Perhaps that’s why many anxiety sufferers also tend to be highly creative people — their minds are used to imagining situations and perspectives that don’t actually exist in the “real world.”

The only way you can experience anxiety is if you yourself create it.  In fact, I would dare to speculate that the less creative a person is, the less likely it is they would experience anxiety and/or panic attacks.  I don’t believe it is a coincidence that over 50% of my coaching clients with anxiety tend to be in creative fields such as design, music, art and writing.

But here’s the good news: because anxiety is a product of the imagination, we can learn to imagine something different, to create new scenarios in our mind that have nothing to do with anxiety or panic attacks.  And the more creative in individual is, the more potential power they have to do this.

I’ve heard it said that we all create our own little universe as we go along — that life is a creative act, and most of what we refer to as “reality” is the product of our own mind.  It is very easy to see the truth of this in anxiety sufferers.  They are clearly creating little “loops” of anxious and unproductive thought that spiral into full-blown anxiety attacks, or at the very least, a low level generalized anxiety that keeps them stressed out and not performing to the best of their ability.

But just as easily as we can create these “loops” of anxiety and panic.  We can also create loops of well-being, peace and optimism.  How do you do that?  The same way you develop any creative skill: practice.  Like any other learned behavior, optimism and a calm state of mind are developed through repetition.

For this reason, the EasyCalm series (www.easycalm.com) lays out a series of simple day-to-day exercises to begin developing this new pattern of thought. It’s not difficult — it only requires consistency.  Repetition is the mother of all skill, and learning to create a better state of mind is a simple as practicing these techniques on a daily basis until they begin to take hold in your unconscious mind.  Once that begins to happen, a calm demeanor becomes your normal operating system, and the imaginary anxiety you use to create, withers away from disuse and neglect.

To start this process is very helpful to realize right now: anxiety is imaginary.  There is NO question about it.  The effects of it can be very real, but the anxiety itself is anything but. You cannot touch it, smell it, see it or hear it.  It exists only within the confines of your creative imagination.  When you realize the truth of this, you will also realize the key to overcoming anxiety — begin using your creative imagination in a new way, and create patterns of thought that are more helpful to you.

Without sounding too much like an infomercial (I hope!), training you to develop these new, more useful patterns of thought is exactly what the EasyCalm series is designed to do.  Check it out!

Jon

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 Excessive yawning is often a symptom of generalized anxiety. Over the past several weeks, I received dozens of e-mails about breathing difficulties and excessive yawning, and in a way, it’s strange that I would receive so many e-mails from people suffering with these problems, because I too once had the excessive yawning symptoms.In my case, I would feel like I could not get a deep enough breath, and consequently, would continue trying to you yawn and take in more and more air. Like many people that e-mail me, I felt that I was probably the only person in the world with this strange anxiety symptom. Obviously, now I know much better…

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I received an email today that referred to anxiety attacks as “a series of very unfortunate head games.” I believe that’s about as good a description of of anxiety attacks and their symptoms as I’ve ever heard, because, in the end, they are in fact “all in your head.”

But this doesn’t mean that anxiety doesn’t produce very real (an even painful) effects in your life, including physical symptoms that often mimic other health problems. This is something I’m personally acquainted with: when my anxiety attacks were at their worst, I saw many doctors and had countless tests run only to discover that I was physically healthy as a horse.

In my case, I was suffering with breathing problems, which very closely mimicked the symptoms of asthma. In fact, I was sure I had asthma, and was beginning to question the common sense of my doctors as, time and time again, the tests showed not even the slightest hint of asthma, or any other condition. But if the doctors were right, then why was I having trouble breathing?

Today I understand full well why I was having these symptoms, and how anxiety attacks brought on by chronic stress and mental fatigue can produce very real physical symptoms in the body. Anxiety may be a “state of mind,” but it doesn’t just affect the mind. It is a whole body and mind problem.

This is something I did not realize for many years, but seems fairly obvious to me today. Understanding this mind/body connection made be able to deal with my anxiety attacks symptoms in a much more effective manner, eventually reducing the problem to nothing more than an occasional nuscence, NOT an every day situation.

The techniques I used to overcome this problem are now available to anyone in the EasyCalm Anxiety Prevention Series and they’re not at all complicated. It’s funny; when I stopped “trying so hard” to defeat my anxiety symptoms, and learned the simple but effective tools to deal with them, the problem cleared up pretty quickly.

Struggling or fighting against anxiety attacks only makes them worse (and I should know–I was thick enough to continue trying this for quite a few years!). That’s why today,  I never recommend over-focusing on anxiety attacks and symptoms. You DO have to deal with them, but not by immersing yourself in the problem.

The simple, straight-forward approach produces the best results, and thankfully, is also the easiest way to deal with anxiety. No struggling against it, and no fighting the symptoms.

Take Care,
Jon

Jon Mercer, MA
Personal Development Coach
www.easycalm.com

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Anxiety attacks suck. We all know that. But you know, the way you choose to live your life can “set the stage” for anxiety and panic attacks, or…it can make these things less likely to occur. This comment is not meant to “blame” anyone, but rather, to encourage us all to take responsibility for the choices we make. For example, you can’t expect to make much progress with your anxiety if you are not eating right, not getting any exercise, drinking heavily or otherwise neglecting your body. The decisions you make in these areas do affect your mental state.

 Likewise, think about what you are giving your attention to in your everyday life. Do you watch lots of “slasher” films or scary,  overly-dramatic TV shows? You can’t expect to feel peaceful and centered if you are focusing lots of attention on these kinds of “anxiety-heavy” programs. In fact, an informal poll I took once indicated that anxiety sufferers tend to watch more TV than people with no history of anxiety. Of course this poll was not scientific, just a random sample of clients I’ve worked with, but the results certainly were interesting…

 The first step in overcoming anxiety and panic attacks is to take responsibility, and beginning TODAY,  take some action (no matter how small) to improve your situation. Watch less crap on TV, exercise a bit more, even just drink an extra glass of water each day! All of these “little things” quickly add up to a big change in how you feel. Your day-to-day choices do matter. Start today–start now!

 Take care,
Jon Mercer, MA
www.easycalm.com

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